Social outings can be disastrous when you’re trying to watch your spending, especially restaurants and bars. Most of the time I am a happy little introvert who likes staying in anyway but sometimes there are occasions you just don’t want to miss.
My family asked us out for dinner last week, I had been watching my spending so I did have some money left in my checking account. I was delighted that I could afford to go. Spending time with people I love and eating yummy food is a favourite activity.
My aunt chose an affordable restaurant, a gourmet pizza place. We checked the menu ahead of time and decided we could share a grilled duck and onion relish pizza (OMG yum) plus a glass of wine each. The total would come in well under $50 if we didn’t get tempted by any other tasty dishes (or the second glass of wine!).
At the end of the meal my Aunt announced that we will split the bill equally amongst the adults. I’m astounded as she often talks about her finances and I thought maybe she was watching her budget too. Even worse I feel too shy in front of my family to say anything. I caved and paid my share of the bill which came to ~$95 and some change. I have just paid $100 for a pizza and 2 glasses of wine and I feel terrible.
So whats the solution? In this instance I will let it go because whats done is done, it was a special night out with some pretty amazing news being announced. (So I want to remember the night as a celebration!) Certainly I don’t want to be remembered as quibbling over the bill. However I learnt some important lessons.
For any transaction, know how you will be charged and don’t let others decide how to spend your money for you.
In future I will call ahead to the restaurant and see if they allow individual bill. Some places have let me order at the counter and bring my meal to the table with the rest of the group or pay separately at the end. I’ll also be upfront with family at the beginning of the meal. “Hey I’ve only got $50 for eating out tonight so I’m just going to split a pizza.” A little communication goes a long way.
It did get me thinking, what if I have been guilty of doing this? Have I ever put someone in the position of spending more than they wanted to? Perhaps I could be more sensitive to my friends and the social activities I suggest. For example I plan for spending some money every month on craft beer. I love it, I brew it, it makes me happy but I possibly have friends who get a little annoyed when I recommend going to the latest craft beer place, the beers are way more expensive than standard brews.
We all have different priorities for spending money and my must do craft beer experience is someone else’s $100 pizza.